I really feel that I have finally become a grown-up. Its not because I have become more responsible or that I'm earning now. Its because I have lost my dreams; I spend most of the day looking at the clock, waiting for the day to end and I feel miserable most of the time. Back when I was a student, I wouldn't have time to look at the clock or even to have food. I was busy doing whatever it was that I was doing and I loved doing it. Now-a-days, others love what I'm doing (I mean, the society praises a young adult who has joined a reputed IT company and is earning a hefty sum), but I hate what I've become.
Its not necessarily the work that I hate. I've learned to love almost everything that I do in my life and I can manage work. But not finding time to do things that I loved so much, is really depressing. When I was gaming, people used to say that kids who play computer games all day have no life at all. But now, I realize that its the IT-employees that have no life at all. The worst part is probably that, there is no scope to dream at all. The further you go up the ladder (in the company), the more time you have to spend in the office and the more you miss your life.
I'm losing my ability to dream. When you start to think realistically rather than dreaming about possibilities, you know that your time is up. I believe mine is about to end. Even if I had studied well and joined an even bigger IT firm, I would've felt the same way. I know this for a fact because an old friend of mine who did exactly that feels just like I do. From an young age we are given only one aim. Its to find a job that pays us a lot of money. But our aim should have been to a find a job that we would love to do. Anything else, just won't do.