It has been a really long time since my last blog post. Power fluctuations at night, work, DotA, website, bla bla, so many reasons for why I didn't blog. But the truth is probably that I was neither enthusiastic about anything nor was I upset enough to make a post and vent my anguish. Then why post now? Simple! Because I'm upset. Why am I upset? Reasons are as follows:
No Competitive DotA
Competitive DotA was always something that kept me going. A chance to learn, to fight, to improve, to work as a team.. Sadly, my team is in no mood to play. Weirdly enough, they keep blaming each other saying the other person isn't interested/serious and what not. Nothing better than a team that can't get together and do what they do..
No Help with my Dream
Almost a week ago, I made yet another desperate attempt at nurturing some interest among my mates in my little website. All I managed to force them to do, was make a phone call or two. Sadly, I do that every week for the site. I realized something else. When I tried to brainstorm about the site, people were throwing out so many ideas and were arguing about how their idea was better than the other person's idea. In the end, when I asked them to work on it, they just went silent! Looks like everyone can come up with ideas, but when it comes to working for it and proving themselves, few are ready. Like Batman said, "Its not who you are inside; its what you do that defines you"
If there was one thing that I didn't want in my job, it was extra work hours. Well, considering that I'm mostly in the office from 7am to 7pm, I don't think that wish came true. Hopefully, I'll get better at what I do and so will my colleagues so that we can be more efficient and spend less time in the cubicle.
I reach home around 8pm and I leave at 6.30am.. But from 9pm to 2am, the voltage is so low that I'm not able to use my system. Whenever things went really wrong in my life, I used to turn to my computer for relaxation and rehabilitation. Sadly, that too has been taken away from me.
All that is probably just in my head. I mean, think about it, I'm employed, I have a good bike, a home, a future and what not! But still, something seems missing.. Oh yes! A Dream!! Its hard to Dream alone. Its hard to work towards a dream when you are lonely in the battle. I need a fool to share my dream with!!